The first time I tried to run after my first baby, I made it about thirty seconds before the urge to pee hit me. I’d had my six-week check. I was “cleared.” And there I was, barely down the road, already learning that cleared and ready are not the same thing.
So I did the sensible thing and went to a pelvic floor physio. She gave me the hard truth: my body wasn’t ready to run yet. The problem was, I was leading a run group — 5, 10, sometimes 15 kilometres, twice a week. Stepping back didn’t feel like an option. So I asked her the only question I could think of: how do I make this work anyway, knowing I’m not ready?
And then I pushed through. Of course I did. I wore double pads and black leggings to hide the leaks while I ran. I told myself I was managing it.
I wasn’t. The pelvic floor connects to everything, and when you ignore what it’s telling you, the rest of the body starts paying the bill — for me, in a run of niggling injuries that wouldn’t quite go away. It took me far too long to admit the obvious: the only way forward was to step back first.
Because the timeline nobody hands you is the real one. Six weeks is when the paperwork says you’re healed. It is not when your body actually is.
The recovery you can’t see
The visible stuff gets all the attention — the bleeding stops, the bump softens, the scar fades. But the recovery that matters most is the one nobody can see.
Your pelvic floor has carried a pregnancy, and often a birth. Your deep core — the muscles that hold you steady through every lift, sneeze, and flight of stairs — has been stretched and switched off, and has to be taught how to fire again. For many of us there’s a separation through the middle, a heaviness low down, or a leak when we laugh or run that we were never warned about and quietly assume we just have to live with now.
You don’t. But you also can’t crunch or bounce your way out of it. This kind of recovery is built from the inside out — and it takes far longer than anyone tells you. Months, usually. Not weeks.
The pressure to “bounce back”
Everywhere you look, there’s a clock and a finish line. Bounce back. Get your body back. Be the before-photo again.
Here’s what I want you to hear: your body didn’t go anywhere. It did something enormous. The goal was never to rewind it. The goal is to rebuild it — stronger, steadier, and able to carry the very full life you’re living now.
“Back” was always the wrong direction. We’re going forward.
How to actually come back
So where do you start? Gently, and from the foundation.
- Begin with your breath. Before any program, relearn the connection between your breath, your deep core, and your pelvic floor. It sounds almost too small to matter. It’s the thing everything else is built on.
- Walk before you run. Literally. Easy walks rebuild your capacity — and your confidence — long before impact does.
- Rebuild in order. Foundation first, then strength, then (when your body is ready) power and impact. Skipping steps is exactly what sends people backwards.
- Get assessed — by the right person. A qualified pelvic floor (women’s health) physiotherapist is worth their weight in gold. Check the credentials: you want a registered physiotherapist with specific pelvic health training — not a salon or studio promising a quick “bounce back.” If you’re leaking, feeling heaviness or pressure, or noticing your belly “cone” or dome when you move, that’s information. Go and get it checked properly.
- Treat fuel and rest as part of the training. Because they are. You can’t rebuild on empty and no sleep, so eat enough, and take the rest whenever you can get it.
It won’t be linear (and that’s normal)
Some days you’ll feel strong and capable. The next, one broken night flattens you and it feels like you’re back at square one. That isn’t failure — that’s postpartum. Recovery loops and doubles back. It rarely climbs in a clean, straight line.
And if the heaviness you’re carrying feels more emotional than physical, that matters too. Please don’t tough it out alone — reach out to someone you trust, or a professional. Looking after your mind is part of recovery, not separate from it.
The same thread, all the way through
You don’t bounce back. You build forward — slowly, from the foundation, with patience for a body that just did one of the hardest things a body can do.
It took me double pads and a string of injuries to learn that. Stepping back was the only way I ever moved forward.
That’s not a lesser kind of strength. It might be the truest kind there is.
Pushed through the leaks and the injuries like I did? There’s a better way back. My free Return to Running Postpartum guide walks you from the foundation up to running again — strong, steady, and without the double pads.
And if you want the bigger picture, the first chapter of my book — Strength Through the Messy & Beyond — is free to read too. It’s an honest look at why so much fitness advice was never built for the reality of women’s lives. The book launches on 19 August 2026; you can read the first chapter free or pre-order it now.
Daniëlle van der Leest
Women’s Strength & Wellbeing Coach | Founder of ActiveWomen | Mum of 3
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